Some people when they hear your story, contract. Others upon hearing your story, expand. And this is how you know. -Nayyirah Waheed A client of mine recently relayed a devastating story. After much pushing from her boyfriend to tell him more about her she told him about an experience of sexual assault. And then he…

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Trauma Impostor Syndrome

I was recently listening to a client invalidate her experience of emotional abuse in childhood by the “other people had it worse than me” sentiment and it dawned on me what we were dealing with here was not a passing thought but a full-blown strategy – one with gnarly roots and gangly, thorned branches. And…

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“You get what you tolerate.” — Henry Cloud THIS QUICK GUIDE TO HEALTHY HOLIDAY BOUNDARIES CAN HELP YOU STAY FOCUSED AND TRUE TO YOURSELF. Healthy boundaries can be challenging to navigate, but setting and communicating them is important for your health and wellbeing. They create a clear framework that tells others how to treat you…

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I recently was interviewed for an article in The Boston Globe on reasons why people may choose to be alone on Thanksgiving. It got me thinking about what a trigger the holidays can be for people for a variety of reasons (food, drinks, family, chaos – what could go wrong?). Holidays for many of my…

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A guide for potential victims Trigger warning: This post contains extreme sarcasm. My intent is not to make light of sexual assault but rather to call out the myriad of ways our society blames victims. 1. Dress conservatively. 2. Always be on the lookout wherever you go for potential perpetrators. Scan a room and make…

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Trigger warning: This post makes light of shame. My intent is to validate and normalize people’s experiences of shame rather than to make fun in any way of people who are experiencing it. If you feel you may be triggered by my sarcasm please skip this post. As we prepare for the cold winter months…

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Please note: this article contains frank language about sexual assault which may be triggering to some readers. In my therapy office one of the most common questions I get asked directly or subtly is if I consider a client’s experience of sexual assault as sexual assault. The bolder clients will ask directly though usually with…

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