Posts by Rachel Stanton

“Mom, someone hurt me” — What She Said Next Matters a Lot

When something novel happens babies and small children will look to their parents to see how they should react. Their parent’s reaction then serves as a guide for how they should respond to this new thing or situation. From their parent’s reaction the baby will be trying to interpret whether this experience is safe, dangerous,…

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6 Painful and Unseen Side Effects of Being Sexually Assaulted

You may have heard about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and are somewhat familiar with the debilitating symptoms like flashbacks, intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and nightmares. Sexual assault is a form of trauma that can lead to the development of PTSD. Sexual assault can also impact you in other complicated ways. I want to share with…

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What is Emotional Abuse?

“He never hit me or anything.” “They weren’t that bad.” Does that sound familiar? If so, you’re not alone. I often hear these statements from my therapy clients. They might be referencing their parents or a previous partner. The content displays the same thought process: And if I wasn’t abused then the things my therapist…

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EMDR Session

If you’re curious about what an EMDR session is like, here is a video of me doing an EMDR session. The person featured is a colleague of mine who volunteered to be filmed processing a real traumatic event involving a car accident. She has given her permission for this video to be shared with you.

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What is it like to do PC?

After a sexual assault or trauma, our brain doesn’t simply “move on” like it does after other events. When you think about what happened, it feels on some level like it’s still happening – your brain hasn’t moved it into long-term memory storage. When triggered, that memory pops right up and our thoughts, body, and…

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A Sarcastic Survival Guide: 5 Tips for Avoiding Sexual Assault

Please follow these tips if you want to avoid being blamed if someone sexually assaults you. 1. Don’t use dating apps like Tinder, Grindr, Hinge, etc. to meet people. If you want to go on dates or meet new people, you must bring your parental figure or private security guard along with you to safe…

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What is it like to do EMDR?

This is by far the most frequently asked question I get asked by potential clients. It’s hard to find information on what the process of EMDR is actually like to go through. I see a lot of overly technical discussion and also vague stories of the “magic” that is the result of EMDR. I’m hoping…

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9 Things Your Trauma Therapist Wants You to Know

It’s possible to heal. There may always be a scar but there isn’t always a pain. If you’re experiencing it, then other people do too. You are not alone. Shame often develops after trauma. It is an emotion – the feeling or sense of being “bad”. Shame can feel intense but that doesn’t make it…

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A Trauma Therapist’s Perspective: Understanding the Thoughts of Sexual Predators of Children and How this Influences the Child’s View of Themselves

Content Warning: This post references childhood sexual abuse and may be triggering to those who have experienced sexual trauma. Childhood sexual abuse survivors share some common themes in emotions and thoughts: shame (there must be something really wrong with me), guilt (some of my behavior probably led to me being targeted), and confusion (what really…

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7 Myths About Trauma

Whether you’ve experienced a recent sexual assault, childhood sexual abuse, or witnessed something scary, you might learn to believe some common misconceptions about trauma. Research on how the brain and body interact with our environment is relatively new and many of our individual & societal beliefs haven’t quite caught up with what we have learned…

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